Reflections

Ok. Fast Draft is over. I didn't write as much as I was supposed to, but I at least wrote something and I'm farther along now than I was. So, all in all, it was a good experience. NaNoWriMo is next month and I think I'll participate in that, too. With all this "help" surely I'll be able to get finished with a first draft by the end of the year. That's my goal.

On another note, my middle child turned 18 yesterday. I'm feeling a bit nostalgic and I'm feeling a bit blue, but I know it's time to let go, at least a little bit. I can't let go completely, of course, becuase he's still my baby and always will be. But he's growing up, just like the oldest did, and just like the youngest is going to do when she turns 18 next year. I'm beginning to feel the empty next syndrome thing even though they haven't moved out yet. But I know I'll be fine and so will they.

JAM, the oldest, is coming home from Iraq for a 2 week visit next week. And I'm going to San Antonio this weekend for his daughter's 1st birthday and to bring my daughter-in-law & grand daughter back here to stay. I'm so excited. I can't wait to get my hands on CDM. She's growing up so fast, just like her father, uncle & aunt did, and I want to experience as much of her life as I can. I know eventually they'll be stationed somewhere else and I won't get to see them so this little bit of time will be all I have. At least until one of the other kids gives me grandkids (which I hope is a long time coming, mind you!).

I may be feeling a little blue, but at the same time I'm looking forward to just being me again. For so long I've been "mom". I'll still be "mom" of course and now I'll also be "mammaw" but to be just me will be a welcome change. I won't be making decisions based on what the kids need or want. I'll finally be able to base a decision on what I want for a change. So, maybe empty nest won't be as bad as I thought.